


Taming a Wildcat

by CrimsonGabsy



Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Ending, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Banana Fish Ending Fix-It, M/M, our boys will be happy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-07
Updated: 2019-07-07
Packaged: 2020-06-24 02:37:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,982
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19714585
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrimsonGabsy/pseuds/CrimsonGabsy
Summary: Ash Lynx chose to die. But did Aslan Callenreese?





	Taming a Wildcat

**Author's Note:**

> I disagree with Yoshida's official opinions about the ending, I dont think happiness can be found in a death, specially of a young person.  
> Sooo as my own way to cope with that, I wrote this piece. Boy, it went longer than I expected but I poured my heart on it. Also its my first work here, please be kind <3

Blank and numb.

That’s all he could feel after shooting the man who stabbed him. Ash could barely bring himself to even be able to hear anything, as he was almost dissociating due pain and the sudden rush of adrenaline after trying to run to the airport and see his friend and end up being stabbed by Lao over a misunderstanding.

At this point, he didn’t even consider going to the hospital. It would be helpless anyway, wouldn’t it? He didn’t think that if he asked for help his friends would make it in time, and he was still a wanted criminal, in the best case scenario he would be rotting in jail for his crimes. Lao’s attack made him certain of this: while he was still alive, while Golzine’s heir was still around, he would always be chased. Always would have to look for his back, until the day he wouldnt be able to anymore.

As much as it would hurt... Eiji would be better away from him. Back to his home, with his Family, away from that circle of violence, he’d grow up to become the sucessful photographer he was aiming to be. Maybe he’d even build his own family, and spend his whole life in peace.

Then Ash would have to take his decision.

He didn’t fear death, but never longed for it.

But if it meant that the most important person in his whole life would be safe... then he would take it. Such a wonderful person like Eiji should never get close again to a criminal like him. He was unworthy, his hands have been dirty with blood from other people. People like Shorter, for example.

His stomach swirled in pain as he finally reached the public library. The spot he was looking for wasn’t very far away, but with the pain and constant bleeding it seemed like he would never reach it, his vision going black at least two times before reaching it.

He had managed to save Eiji’s letter, his most prized possession at the moment. The airplane ticket was gone, but he wouldn’t be able to use it anyway. He just lamented how upset would Eiji look like when seeing that Ash wouldn’t be able to come to visit him. But it was for a great good. Eiji would be safe...

As he sat in the nicely sculpted chair, wincing in pain but still careful to not to get atention, he took the letter in his hands again. If he had to go, that at least it would be in his favourite place Reading again the words of the person he loved most.

_“You are not a leopard. You can change your future.”_

_“My soul is Always with you.”_

Ash’s own tears mixed with he bloodstains that had dripped in the letter. Eiji was the most beautiful person he had ever met, in every sense.

He looked up at the library window when he heard an airplane. Checking the time, it would be probably Eiji’s flight. His wish was for his friend to reach home safely.

His vision went dark again, and this time he didn’t stuggle against it. He didn’t know if the grim reaper would come for him right now or if he was just passing out from blood loss. Whatever he was, he would gladly take it if that meant the pain would stop.

He rested his head on the table and closed his eyes.

It was odd. He didnt exactly wish for it, but he was okay with it happening. For once, his mind seemed to be in peace. It didn’t take long before his consciousness would be gone.

His lips were curled up in a soft smile. To anyone who wouldnt pay much atention, it really looked like he was having the most beautiful dream ever.

_Good night, Ash Lynx._

_*******_

A beeping noise.

Not exactly annoying, but wouldn’t also be something anyone would like to hear, as it meant that a loved one was stuck in a hospital ever if being perfectly fine hours ago.

But in other cases, it was relieving. It meant the said person had survived a serious injury and would be recovering now.

It was clear that relief, peace and happiness were different for lots of people. For some, it would be in death. They think they would be free from every suffering in the world by finally freeing themselves in the embrace of nothingness. For others, it would be having a second chance to set things right, as hard as it would seem.

Aslan Callenreese thought it would be the former.

He let out a soft groan before slowly opening his eyes, wincing at the light of the room coming straight to his eyes. Wait... light? Where was he? He noticed that he wasn’t in the library anymore. Was him... was him dead? No... He noticed the beeping noise and the fact that he was laying down in a soft place. Most importante. He noticed that he was connected to an IV.

He was more suprised than disappointed. Even confused. How did he even end up there?

“Welcome back to the world of living” a familiar voice said, and the blonde one soon realized who it was.

“Max...? W...where am I? How did you find me?” He asked, in a confused tone, unusual from his regular self.

“You’re lucky to have friends who care about you more than anything” he said, resting his back in the wall next to the door. “That day when for God knows why reason you decided to bleed out in the library, we were coming back from the airport at time. We could see it. There was a commotion in the front of it. It seemed they found a dead body, and there was a trail of blood leading inside. It seemed that a library worker found you ‘sleeping’ in a chair before all of that, but she didn’t want to wake you up” he scratched the back of his head, letting out na annoyed sigh. “I guess she was too busy to actually pay attention at your wounds. But seems that she came back later about a few hours, finding odd that you've been sleeping for too long, then she finally noticed your wound and called 911”.

Ash went pale. “No! T-That means that I’ll end up in-“

“No need to worry.” Max quickly interrupted him, before the boy would come up with another suicidal idea. “As I said, you have friends who care about you. They are all taking care of things for you. Just trust them, okay? If it wasn't for them maybe even I wouldn't be able to help you.”

The blonde one went silent. His mind was racing with a million thoughts and feelings at same time. But his most important one was Eiji. Did he know?

“You’ve been out for almost three days. They had to give you a blood transfusion. You can say that we are blood related now.” He said in a playful tone.

Ash noticed the cotton bandage in Max arm and the one in his own arm. “...w...why did you...?”

“I couldn’t let you go like this, kid... I guess I did the right thing.” He said, looking out the window at the afternoon sky.

Ash was lost in thoughts again. "Thank you..." He quietly muttered. Even if being saved wasn't in his plans, he couldn't help but feel glad that Max would do such a thing for him. Max knew what was going through the kid's mind.

“In case you’re wondering, he had the right to know. He’s been here, waiting for you to wake up. Came back from Japan yesterday."

His green eyes widened, and he felt his heart going up to his throat. “No! W-why? He shoudn’t! Its dange—”

“You’d say it’s dangerous, it isn’t?” the familiar soft and accented voice said, and Ash froze before he could turn to face the one who just appeared in the door. And it was really him. Eiji. It had been clear that he hadn’t slept properly in the past night, having forced himself awake with lots of cups of espresso like the one he was holding right now.

Max stood up, taking his jacket from the chair. “I’ll give you two some privacy. You guys have a lot to talk to each other” he said, quietly closing the door behind him.

An unsettling silence went between the American boy and the Japanese one.

Eiji wasn’t the type of person who would easily lose his temper. He was often calm and compassionate. But with the right reasons, he could be as frightening as a mom waiting for their child to come home past curfew.

The silence broke as Ash finally managed to get strenght to say something. “Why are you here...?” He asked in a soft tone, clearly ashamed.

Eiji’s frustration at Ashs decision to have died was so big that he could't even bring himself to get to the absurdness of that question. “Why do you think? To check if you had taken a haircut?” he replied sarcastically.

Ash just looked down. Its not that he wasn’t happy to see Eiji. He was just worried that he was there. Hell, Eiji _should’t_ be near Ash ever again. Specially in such a situation. Eiji should just go live his life, they’d still be friends forever, even if they could never see each other again.

But that wasn’t what Eiji believed.

“I want you to answer this question, Aslan.” Eiji said, gently taking Ash’s hand, making the blonde one’s heart race in his chest. He rarely gets called by his real name, and when he does it’s enough to drop his ruthless killer façade, specially when it comes from someone like Eiji.

“W...what is it?” He asked, like a kid when they know they’re about to get scolded for doing something wrong.

“Why do you think that you don’t deserve to be happy?”

The blonde one went silent for a moment before finally taking a breath to answer. “I am happy as long as I know that you are safe.”

“And what makes you think that _you_ dying would ever make me safe?” He asked, looking straight at Ash’s eyes.

____

____

“You’d be free from this life of violence, Eiji” he answered honestly. “You wouldn’t have to deal with anymore blood, death and injustice. You wouldn’t have to see your friends die ever again. You wouldn’t ever get tortured, kidnapped and threatened ever again. You could finally live your life peacefully, and...” his voice was cracking. “You can’t live this life with me around.”

Eiji closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. The wound he got back that day still hurt, but it was healing. He was a strong kid. “Ash—no, Aslan...you—” He felt tears coming to his eyes again. As if he hadn’t cried enough the whole evening. “How many times do I have to tell you? I already wrote it. Do you also need me to draw it?” His voice was louder than he expected, making Ash flinch a little.

“It was my choice to stay with you, Aslan. It was my choice to help you. It was my choice to make sure that you wouldn’t feel lonely ever again, that I could help you to face everything in the world without having to worry about a thing. I’d take as many bullets as necessary if that means you could achieve a better life”. At this point, he wasnt even trying to stop his tears.

“Then we aren’t really that much different.” Ash spoke softly, avoiding the look in shame. He knew he had made Eiji upset, and it hurt. "All I wanted was for you to be fine..."

“We aren’t! We aren't that different at all! You deserve better than just disappear! You can change your destiny, Aslan! You don’t need to live Always watching your back, don’t need to kill to survive anymore. You can just be yourself. You don’t need to be Ash Lynx if you don’t want to anymore! You don’t have to pretend youre tough just to protect me! You...” he took a deep breath, gently caressing the side of Ash’s face. “You can be just yourself . It doesn’t matter the name you go by. You can be the kid who is afraid of pumpkins, who’s cranky in early mornings, that loves shrimp and avocado salad. That loves Hemingway books."

Ash paid deep attention at his words, absorbing each sentence, gently leaning at Eiji’s touch, pretty much like a kitten. It felt good. It was like going home. He could feel the sincerity in what Eiji was saying. But he still had worry lingering in his chest.

Eiji's hands were shaking slightly, but he'd go to the bottom of it. "If I knew that you didn't make it... I... I don't even know if I'd be able to go on properly... I'd think about you, every day, every night... Look at every picture I had of you... And blaming myself for not having been able to see you ever again." He wasn't lying. He would never say goodbye to Ash. He'd lever let go of him, either physically or mentally.

That part made Ash's eyes fill up in tears. He was certain that his decision would be for the best for Eiji's wellbeing, but didn't consider much how his friend would go on with that. It made him rethink... was Ash even worth it? 

“How can I ever change my ways, Eiji?” He asked, gently taking Eiji’s hand from his face just to hold it. “I’ve been raised a criminal, I’ve been trained in every way to kill people. I can kill someone without them even realizing that I’m around. It... It just comes naturally... that and...” His stomach swirled in the next part. “That...” his breathing became harsh, as if he was about to have na anxiety attack. “And doing _those stuff_ , Eiji... just for power...”

Eiji held Ash’s hand with his both. “You’re not a beast, Aslan. All you’ve done was to make sure that you’d live to see another day. If you wished to wake up the next day, it was because deep inside you still wanted to live. You... You’re broken, but that doesn’t mean you should feel loathed. I’m here with you, and as long as you want I’ll always stay by your side.” He took a sip of his espresso. It was mostly cold, but he didn’t really mind. “You are worth hell, Aslan. I’d stay by your side until the depths of it to save you. You’re a human being. You deserve to be happy and loved like everyone”.

Ash’s breath went calmer. “You... you’re really the most amazing person I’ve ever met, Eiji. Seem to always say the right thing.”

Eiji finally had a soft smile. “I could say the same to you, Aslan.” He said, gently stroking Ash’s soft golden locks again. That made Ash finally relax, setting himself to rest his head on Eiji’s lap. It was comfortable. It was like a mother’s lap.

“A dead person can’t fix anything, Aslan. They can’t also feel anything. No remorse, no happiness, and can’t be actually certain that his friends are okay. So... Now that you have a second chance... are you willing to take it?”

Ash was silent for a few moments, then slowly nodded in his lap, a peaceful smile in his lips. “I am willing to, as long as we can watch for each other.”

“It’s a promise.” Eiji agreed, still stroking Ash’s hair. “Listen... I have a few days that I still can spend here in US. Once you get better and all of this get solved, how about we going to Cape Cod again?” He blushed a little. “Just the two of us?”.

Ash slowly lifted up, a teasing look in his face. “Why, do you miss the giant Coke and the fish n’ chips?”

“Well I’d say I miss just go swimming and sleeping under the tree with you, but I’m okay with the snacks too” He teased back.

Ash let out a hearted laugh. “It wouldn’t be a problem. As long as we can go to Izumo together after that. I’d like to visit those temples.”

“Oh, since when did you begin caring about deities?” The japanese boy teased.

The American one chuckled. “Kinda since I was given a second chance. And that ticket you bought me got wasted...” He said in light shame.

Eiji let out a playful sigh. “Don’t worry, it wasn’t your fault. Also, getting another ticket wouldn’t be much of a problem for you, huh rich boy?”

“Oh I see it now! You just want me around cause of my money, right?” He just couldn’t stop teasing Eiji.

“Nope”. He stared at Ash with soft, obviously loving eyes. “I want you around cause you’re the most amazing feline I’ve ever met.” He really wanted to feel Ash’s soft lips on his own. But he would never do it without Ash’s consent.

But of course Ash was fine with that. They were soulmates. He would never hurt Eiji with something they didnt want and vice-versa. He’d never do anything reckless. Now that he knew that there were people waiting for him, even if it was miles of distance.

“You can do it. Eiji. Give me your sweetest kiss. I owe you that since that day in prison.” He said in a soft but happy tone, and Eiji slowly went to reach Ash’s face again, carefully connecting his lips to Ash’s ones.

It felt like home.

Both felt alive and warm inside.

Ash Lynx may have died that day in the library, but the life of Aslan Callenreese was about to begin. This time for real.

_Good morning, Aslan._


End file.
